Food + Sex = Fun

Fun with Food


Nothing turns me on more than a naked chef. Apron only, black latex gloves, a utensil in hand, and I’m ready to be prepped up however Chef demands. There’s something about the vision and control that someone who knows their way around a kitchen commands. Handling the succulent food, the powerful chops and delicate placements, cooking and sex have slept together for years. 


Whether it’s the feeling that someone is taking care of you, commanding or serving you, or just flirting with the decadent life, food-porn works on so many levels. But what about playing with the food itself? 


We are considerate lovers here, and in that spirit, we wanted to gather a few fun food related ideas out there, try some of them out and give you some honest feedback. A word of caution before we start, be careful if allergies are an issue, as the following should contain lots of nuts.


Above all, food is a source of pleasure. I mean, just look at this sexy fruit arrangement, so tempting, don’t you agree?


Peach anyone?

No, not that one!



Ahhh, much better.


Ok so nobody is suggesting fucking a watermelon (exactly) but depending on your tastes and willingness to diversify your acts of love, here’e a few ways to love your food.


Let’s start with an obvious one… 



There are two schools of thought here.


Bagged Au Naturel

1 Condom

1 Large fresh veg (Carrots, Cucumbers, Celery root, Leek).


I Large fresh and firm Carrot 



Wash cover and lube your analog.

Insert gently at first until comfortable.



Wash thoroughly, don’t peel

Insert gently at first until comfortable.



We found this method is fun to try once, but if this is your thing, you’re better off using adult products that are specifically designed for this use, with the veg alternatives being inferior. 


The ridges work well, and the different shapes can make this quite interesting. But again, this is more of a novelty, not a main course.

Perhaps food going in doesn’t interest you, how about the other way around?


As American Pie suggested, there are some natural similarities between baked goods and bangable goodies. A warm and juicy deep dish pie, as weird as it sounds, does feel good, especially when shared with a friend. Depending on what it’s made of (and your own culinary skills) there is some room here for exploration. We would advise cherry or apple, with some raisins thrown in, and avoiding things like seeds and nuts. Remember, it doesn’t have to taste amazing, here it’s the sensation doing the work. To top it off, have some ice cream on hand or cold custard, to really challenge your senses.


Hot and Cold


This is perhaps the most accessible, and often the most rewarding use of food the way it was never meant to be used. Temperature play is very well established in the bedroom. Cold packs or heat rubs can be bought easily, and incorporated diversely. But playing with actual foods adds a certain mischief and taboo which we believe elevates the experience significantly. 


Small chilled fruit like grapes and strawberries, gently placed can also be a lot of fun, particularly with a blindfold, some cuffs, and a tiny helping of cream. Cold maki, warm potato, even steamed dumplings have their place; it really comes down to appetite and imagination. The high liquid content in fruits generally means they keep their temperature and shape nicely. 


A word of caution, avoid pure ice. It definitely looks hot, but that’s about it; as it’s hard to handle, should not be held against skin for long, and a cold water puddle is less fun than it should be. A few frozen grapes on the other hand, can go a long way. 

Licking, Sucking, Nibbling, Chewing


There’s a lot to do with your mouth during foreplay and intercourse. While the following can be done without food at all, there’s something to be said about Sitophilia and all its glory. 

  • Wearing a blindfold, press a lollipop to a dick, and see which one finishes first,
  • Drip some honey or melted chocolate somewhere private and using your tongue, clean it all up. (Although care should be taken around sensitive parts, this works on anyone and is far superior to whipped cream or custard- the more sticky the more fun),
  • Replace massage oil with jam, replacing hands with face,
  • Scatter some edamame beans (unsalted, lightly boiled) and nibble them up, one by one. You could use nuts or candies but we found the sticky and dusty cleanup kinda kills the moment.

So which is our favourite? In all honesty all the above are fun to try once, some a few times, but there is one simple move on our list that doesn’t have to be reserved for any special nights. 


 The Cold Blow


Do your partner a favour… Take a mouthful of a cold drink, melting ice cream or good old yogurt, and go to town on them. We guarantee they won’t be forgetting that pleasure anytime soon, helping yourself to a snack on the job is just an added benefit. 

are you over 18?